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 Your Depression and Bipolar Disorder Source Knowledge is Necessity What you can do to help a friend in crisis. "Seventy-five percent of all those who commit suicide indicate their deep despair beforehand." Main articles page. Go here. More Suicide Prevention Articles
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Suicide Prevention - Part II Hey you! You with the teen-age girl who's driving you nuts. And you, over there! The one with the co-worker who's been acting a bit strange lately. You, too, with the husband who's just made out his will for no good reason. Yeh, and you with the ageing parent who's just come back from the doctor. Have I got everyone? Wait, you over there, the guy who keeps telling his wife to snap out of it. You, all of you - listen up good. Depression and bipolar kill. Sure, you may never have suffered from a major depressive episode yourself, but chances are it will strike at someone close to you. Should that happen, the odds are heavily in favor of your friend or loved one making it through, but how you respond can greatly increase or decrease those chances. Following is some common sense advice: Be Aware According to studies, 75 percent of all those who commit suicide indicate their deep despair beforehand. All but maybe ten percent are sane people who might have responded to help. Take very seriously any possible signs of major depressive illness. These may include fatigue, weight gain or loss, and feelings of hopelessness and worthlessness. A child or teen-ager may feel more hyper or agitated than usual. Keep in mind that any number of situational events can bring on thoughts of suicide, with or without major depression, events such as: marriage breakup, death in the family, difficult birthdays or anniversaries or holidays, or loss of employment. Watch out for sudden changes in behavior. These may include: In your child, declining performance in school. In others: declining interest in previously enjoyed activities, neglect of personal welfare, deteriorating physical appearance. In the elderly, self-starvation, dietary mismanagement, disobeying medical instructions. Take very seriously any signs of suicidal behavior. These may include: explicit statements about suicide, acting-out behavior such as rehearsals or mini-attempts, self-inflicted injuries, reckless behavior, making out a will, giving away possessions, inappropriately saying goodbye, and odd verbal behavior (such as "you won't have to worry about me, anymore"). Things To Say and Not Say Five things to say to a severely depressed or possibly suicidal person:
Five things not to say to a severely depressed or possibly suicidal person:
Planning Ahead Advance knowledge is excellent prevention. Read the previous article on what a depressed person can do, and think what you can do to help that person. If your friend or companion needs someone to call on in a crisis you can be that someone. If you are living at home with a depressed person, you can cooperate in making the house as safe as you can. In an Actual Crisis Listen. Do not be judgmental. Allow the person to vent his or her anger or frustration. Ask if he or she is planning to commit suicide, or has a plan. This gives the person another chance to vent his or her concerns and allows you to gauge the nature of his or her intentions. This question is a fairly standard one, and apparently will not trigger an actual attempt. Do not leave the person alone, once you have determined he or she is suicidal. Try to convince the person to seek help. The fact that he or she is talking to you is a start. Offer to make the necessary arrangements if you think that will get the ball rolling. Remind the person, if necessary, that seeking help for depression no longer carries the stigma it once did, that going for help is not a sign of weakness, and that the chances for recovery are excellent. Be suspicious of any rapid improvements in the person's condition. The individual may be faking recovery in order that you drop your guard. And Finally Keep in mind, one day it could be me. For access to counseling, visit Suicidal.com. For several good articles, visit If you are thinking .... For a national hotline, call: 1-800-333-4444 For a directory of local hotlines, visit About.com. Buy Kay Jamison's Night Falls Fast at Amazon.com. For three free online issues of McMan's Depression and Bipolar Weekly, email me and put "Sample" in the heading and your email address in the body. Suicide Prevention articles All articles
Terry Cochran (July 13, 2001): Hello, I am bipolar too. I do have those days when I feel life is worthless as well as myself.. After reading this article it gives me many things to think about... I still keep suicide as my option so I can feel there is always a way out. Thanks Gerry (Oct 23, 2001): My son was recently diagnosed after attempting suicide, as bipolar. Thanks for this website. It has been encouraging to me. I have printed out your suicide article and plan to ask my son to keep it in his wallet and open it if he feels like committing suicide again. Thanks so much. Mobile Mouse (March 2, 2002): It's hard to imagine that one would even fathom taking their own lives to surrender to that quaking pain that lies within. What about your loved ones? Shouldn't you be thinking about them also? Of course, I ask myself this question every time, and it does successfully stop me from attempting such fate. But, I do love them dearly, and I think to myself "What must be going on in their heads coping with my uncontrolled behaviors?" This would probably be the option I chose to validate killing myself. Its better for them to not have to worry about me afterwards. Its better for myself that I get out of the dark hole I'm in... a hole of never-ending pain, suffering, and inadequacies. Aleesha (Oct 2, 2002): Hi! My name is Aleesha Herbert, I am 20 yrs old and from Arapahoe, NE. I think this is very upsetting huh? I know all about it. Not because my mom committed suicide but because I have attempted it 3 times. I have dealt with depression for years but never sought help. 3yrs. ago I took a raiser to my wrist but nobody got me help. The second time was 2 months ago. I tried running out in front of a car but a friend of mine stopped me. I was admitted into Mary Lannings in Hastings. I was there for 10 days. The third time was last Saturday. I threatened to take a knife to my wrist or OD on my medication so my 12yr. old stepsister called 911 and the cops came out and they called my counselor and she came out. They were going to EPC me but the only way they could is taking me back to Mary Lannings and I refused and my counselor said no because I had problems there the last time I was in there so she took me to Richard Young in Kearney. I was admitted @ 2:00am. Sunday morning and just got out @ 9:30am. Thursday morning. I was there for 5 days. What was causing my mood swings was the Remeron that Mary Lannings put me on so Richard Young took me off of them and put me on Lamictal which is a mood stabilizer. It's suppose to help my depression, anger, anxiety, and concentration. I am going to outpatient therapy there @ Richard Young plus, I see my counselor twice a week. Jenny (Aug 5, 2004): I've had every one of the 5 things NOT to say said to me. the problem is, I also say them to myself. I'm not good enough, and people around me are right when they say it. I've been trying to kill myself since I was 12. I'm going to be 20 in two months. I even remember the exact date of my first attempt: July 21st, 1996. I still cut myself sometimes, but after my last attempt landed me in a mental hospital, I haven't tried again. I've determined that if i do try again, I won't call for help this time. I'll just lay there and let it happen. thanks anyways..... Spence 2/15: My friend was ready to commit suicide recently, I had no idea how to handle it. I immediately got online and looked at this site. I was able to talk her out of it, and now she is at a near bye hospital. I believe that this website saved my friends life, thank you so much. Post your opinion here. |
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